A Meeting at the Crossroads

In a parallel dimension of time, the first light of dawn revealed a bucolic landscape. Morning fog lifted from green fields. Silhouettes of scattered oak trees were like ink strokes in the mist. A nearby brook murmured over stones as birds offered their first notes of the day.

At the center of this suspended countryside, two dirt roads converged at a crossroads beneath an ancient sycamore. Its leaves caught droplets of dew like sequins, and a faint breeze carried the scent of wet grass.

That’s when the meeting occurred.

From the western path came the sound of sandals brushing loose gravel. A hooded figure, dressed in a robe of simple linen, walked with an unhurried pace. Simultaneously from the east, another figure approached. This one wore a saffron cloak with its hood tied loosely at his throat.

Just as the sun had cleared the horizon, their paths intersected beneath the tree and they stopped.

The one in linen pulled back his hood. His beard was full but trimmed, his dark hair falling to his shoulders. His eyes were warm and alert, and he smiled with a grace that could disarm the hardest heart.

“Peace to you, traveler,” he said.

The saffron-robed man lifted his own hood and returned the smile. His face was calm, and his eyes held the serenity of mountain lakes. He bowed his head slightly.

“And peace to you, also.”

They regarded each other for a moment, wind stirring the leaves above them.

“It seems,” said the man in linen, “that even though we came from opposite directions, we were meant to meet at this exact moment. Even more curious, we understand each other’s native tongues.”

 “Perhaps these paths are not what they appear,” the other replied.

The man in linen chuckled softly. “They rarely are.”

The other studied him carefully, recognition lighting his features. “I know of you. The stories of your compassion travel far beyond time. You are Yeshua of Nazareth.”

“And you,” Yeshua answered, his voice touched with reverence, “must be Siddhartha Gautama, the one they call the Buddha, the Awakened One.”

The fog thinned as if to give their meeting more space. The men stared deeply into each other’s eyes.

“Will you sit with me?” said Yeshua, motioning to a massive log beside the crossroads.

Siddhartha nodded. “It will be my pleasure.”

They sat beside each other on bark worn smooth by weary travelers. For a while, neither one spoke as the morning settled warmly around them.

At length, Siddhartha broke the silence.

“It is rare,” he said, “to meet one whose words have shaped the hearts of so many, not only in the past but for ages to come. Your teachings have been transmitted across every continent of this earth.”

Yeshua tilted his head, thoughtful. “Hundreds of earth years separated our lives, but I have also heard of your far-reaching influence. Your path of liberation, your understanding of suffering and how to end it. I know that countless people have been healed because of your teachings and example.”

Siddhartha folded his hands in his lap. “I simply gave witness to what I discovered in my own struggles. I found that freedom begins within. If our mind is tangled, the world appears tangled as well. If our heart is bound up by chasing illusions, no external revolution, no remedy of any government, can loosen its knots.”

Yeshua nodded thoughtfully. “I understand. And yet, societies can crush even the most open hearts with their oppression and violence. Like you, I tended to the wounds of my followers’ souls, but I also challenged systems of oppression. Sometimes the sickness is personal. Sometimes it is communal.”

A soft rustle of wings sounded overhead as a raven landed on one of the sycamore’s branches, cocking its head at them with curiosity.

“I would like to know,” said Siddhartha. “How did you learn the compassion that shaped your path?”

Yeshua took a deep breath. “It started early. My parents taught me that our Creator fashioned every one of us in the divine image. They encouraged me to see this divinity in each person, no matter how low their condition. Later, as I walked from town to town, I looked into the eyes of the poor, the broken, the shunned, and I recognized them as my kin.”

He paused, the memory of dusty Galilean roads flickering in his eyes. “I touched the lepers when others fled. I ate with tax collectors and prostitutes. I tried to help them heal not only their bodies, but their sense of worth in the eyes of God. I saw beauty where others saw disgrace. But please know this. It wasn’t just an effort of my own will that caused this. It was a gift from my Heavenly Father, a calling that I embraced.”

A smile warmed Siddhartha’s face. “I have no belief in deities, but my earthly father surely affected me. He raised me to take my place in the upper class of Brahmins. I still remember his anger and disappointment when I left the palace where I had been raised. I threw off the privileges that shielded me and sought to understand suffering by witnessing it firsthand. I came across the sick, the aged, the dying, and each encounter shaped me.” He turned his head to gaze down the eastern road. “I saw that compassion is not merely a virtue. It is a law of nature. I taught my disciples to love all beings as a mother loves her only child.”

Yeshua leaned forward slightly, intrigued. “Yes. To love beyond all the conditions taught to us by the world. Even to forgive those who wound us.”

Siddhartha’s eyes softened. “You forgave even as you suffered greatly.”

Yeshua nodded and lowered his gaze. “It was hardest thing I ever did, but I saw that those who harmed me were trapped in their own fear and ignorance.” He paused. “And you, my new friend, renounced the wealth of a kingdom. I merely left a carpentry practice that I shared with my father.”

Siddhartha chuckled. “You make it sound superhuman, but it was a matter of my own survival. I was suffocating in gilded bondage. Silk chains are still chains. I knew that my contentment would never be found in luxury.

Yeshua nodded. “I also taught that the love of wealth blinds us. This earth’s riches exist to be shared with the poor, not hoarded by the powerful.”

“Tell more about your notions of generosity.”

Yeshua shrugged. “My words are simple. I teach that wealth is not measured by possessions but by giving. I once encountered a widow who offered two small coins to the temple treasury. They were worth less than a cup of water. Yet she gave more than all the wealthy combined, because she offered everything she had out of love.”

“Intent over quantity,” said Siddhartha. “Purity over display.”

“Exactly.”

“In my own teachings,” Siddhartha said, “I spoke of dāna, the perfection of giving without the attachment of expecting a reward. As we practice dāna and grow more enlightened, there is a sublime offering we have for others. I call it the gift of fearlessness. To me, this is perhaps the highest form of generosity because it helps ease the anxiety and turmoil of others.”

Yeshua looked moved. “I mostly agree. But a hungry person would much prefer a loaf of bread over a philosophical truth. Either way, I taught that when we comfort others, we become a light in the darkness.”

The raven took wing, drifting gracefully over the countryside towards the horizon. Both men followed its flight with their eyes.

“Our teachings align in many ways,” said Siddhartha. “Compassion, nonviolence, and generosity. Yet there is that difference you already mentioned. Perhaps it is rooted in the worlds from which we came.”

Yeshua turned to him. “Yes. I feel it too.”

Siddhartha’s voice grew introspective. “I would like to discuss this more fully if you are willing,”

“Of course,” said Yeshua.

“My path focuses on the individual,” Siddhartha continued. “I teach that if each person frees themselves from desire and delusion, then suffering decreases in the world. A tree grows strong when each root is healthy, not when we try to force the whole forest into harmony.”

Yeshua’s eyes shone with understanding.  “Go on, please.”

“I believe that a liberated consciousness radiates outward naturally. Peace in one person becomes a lantern for those nearby.”

Yeshua gazed down the western road. “While I agree with you in many ways, I walked among people who were burdened by more than their own desires. They suffered under a conquering empire, unjust rulers, and a religious structure that was burdensome rather than uplifting. So I spoke directly to those powers. I confronted corruption. I overturned tables in the temple. I challenged those who used their sacred laws to exploit the vulnerable.”

A gust of wind stirred the leaves above.

Siddhartha considered this. “Your liberation was both inner and outer.”

“Yes,” Yeshua said. “Because a society can trap a soul as surely as craving can.”

“And yet you carried no weapon.”

“Love was my only force,” Yeshua replied simply. “The moment we harm another, we harm ourselves.”

Siddhartha smiled. “In this, we are brothers, even though I question if societal structures will ever truly change. One only needs to view the entirety of human history to see how oppression continues from generation to generation, how violence begets violence.”

Sunlight slanted across their faces. For a moment the men seemed less like historical figures and more like long-term companions sharing memories.

Yeshua clasped his hands together. “Siddhartha,” he said gently, “your path turned inward to heal the roots of suffering within the heart.”

“Yes,” the Buddha said. “That was my way.”

“I also sought a kingdom of the heart,” Yeshua said, “but one that actively confronted the unjust structures of the world.”

Siddhartha breathed in the scent of the fields surrounding them, “I often wondered if my path should have addressed the world more directly. But I feared that confronting systems would drag me into the very entanglements I sought to dissolve. How can you uproot a poisonous tree while remaining free from the toxin?”

Yeshua gazed upward as the sunlight gathered strength. “I wondered the opposite. Sometimes confronting those forces only made them more determined to strike back. It also sharpened my tongue and my approach. Perhaps my willingness to challenge them so openly hastened not only my own suffering, but that of others as well. Yet I felt compelled to name injustice wherever I saw it.”

Siddhartha bowed his head in recognition. “Different approaches. Neither of them easy.”

“Yes,” Yeshua murmured, “very different methods. But we both sought peace.”

“And unity among all beings,” Siddhartha added. “A world where compassion is like the air that people breathe.”

They looked at each other with quiet, profound understanding.

Siddhartha looked up at the branches of the sycamore. “Sitting here reminds me of the most important night of my life. I had tried one form of meditation and asceticism after another. Finally, weary that I would ever experience full awakening, I sat beneath an enormous tree, determined to break through or die on that spot.”

Something caught in Yeshua’s voice. “I, too, found my greatest moment of victory with my back against a tree’s wood. It was only then, in the depths of my worst suffering, that I was able to embrace the fullness of what I had taught.”

They both fell into silence, recalling the pathways that led to this moment outside of time.

Finally, Yeshua rose to his feet. Siddhartha followed. They stood facing one another.

Siddhartha said, “The world is large, Yeshua. Too large for one method alone.”

“You speak the truth,” Yeshua replied. “The world needs multiple invitations toward wholeness.”

Siddhartha’s eyes brightened. “Then may our teachings be like two rivers flowing toward the same sea.”

The wind picked up again, rustling their robes. Yeshua extended his arms and embraced Siddhartha. The Buddha returned the embrace without hesitation.

When they stepped back, Siddhartha placed his palms together at his heart and bowed. “May all beings find the end of suffering. May you walk in peace, my friend Yeshua.”

Yeshua lifted his right hand in blessing. “Shalom aleichem. Peace be upon you, Siddhartha, wherever your steps lead.”

They smiled like two old friends on that road between worlds, joined for a moment where past and future dissolve.

Then, with no further words, they turned.  Siddhartha headed westward to new horizons, sun casting his shadow before him. Yeshua walked eastward with a new understanding, his shadow following behind him.

 The crossroads was quiet, except for the wind in the sycamore and birdsongs echoing over the fields.

And for a breath of time outside of time, the world felt a bit more whole.

Under the Bell Jar with Sylvia

But I wasn’t sure. I wasn’t sure at all. How did I know that someday—at college, in Europe, somewhere, anywhere—the bell jar, with its stifling distortions, wouldn’t descend again? – from “The Bell Jar” by Sylvia Plath

Throughout my career, I walked with the wounded. I communed with those suffering grief, addiction, disease, and mental illness. I’m certain that my personal struggles, so close to the surface, helped me become what Henri Nouwen called a “wounded healer.” It was a privilege to share sacramental moments with fellow human beings.

There’s an incident seared in my memory. Bob, a member of a church I served, had reached the end of what he could tolerate. He took a pistol, walked out to his driveway around midnight, and shot himself. I lived two blocks away, where I was awoken by my phone jangling. It was a police officer. An ambulance was on its way, he said, but Bob, somehow still conscious, was asking for Pastor Krin to come to his side. I got there quickly, where I kneeled next to him, his head haloed by blood. Under the bell jar, our eyes met. I assured him that both his Creator and I loved him, and that nothing could separate him from that reality. I believed it then; I still do.

Miraculously, he survived without brain damage and went on to heal the underlying depression that drew him into the abyss.

My empathy for those who suffer has never subsided. Recently it extended to Esther Greenwood, the main character of Sylvia Plath’s only novel, The Bell Jar, published just before she committed suicide. Set during a single summer, it’s the story of a young woman’s descent into depression. Beginning with a writer’s internship in New York, she plummets through a series of mental asylums, enduring primitive shock treatments along the way.

The novel had been on my radar for years, one of those “must reads” for students of serious literature. I knew about Sylvia’s tumultuous relationship with poet Ted Hughes. I had read some of her poems which really didn’t speak to me, but this novel was both lyrical and terrifying. I will never forget it.

The bell jar becomes a metaphor, a symbol of the pressures Esther faces to conform to societal norms. The conventional paths of marriage and motherhood, held up as ultimate goals for women, feel like chains to her, stifling her ambitions and suffocating her spirit. She yearns for freedom, for the ability to define her own life, yet every attempt to assert control pushes her further into despair.

Esther speaks of this inner turmoil. “I was supposed to be the author of my own life.” “I wanted to be intelligent and popular.” “I wanted to be a perfect person.” “I always believed that if I did or said the right thing, then everything would turn out all right.” “What is the point of this life if we are not living it to the fullest?”

Increasingly, depression dictates her thoughts. “It was as if I were always wearing a mask.” “I felt like I was drowning.” “The world was a big, dark ball, and I was all alone.” “The only thing I could do was stay quiet and let the shadows take me.” “I wanted to disappear.”

Seen through the bell jar’s distortion, Esther’s urge to vanish means ending her life. She contemplates multiple methods. Jumping off a roof. Drowning in the ocean. Then, in her most dedicated effort, taking an overdose of pills.

That final attempt still chills me. Esther makes her way to the family cellar, then to a dugout tucked in its furthest recess. She crawls inside, pulls some firewood against the entrance, and takes every pill in her bottle.

It’s hard to describe how that affected me. I was right there, sitting next to her in the damp darkness, powerless to banish her despair, bearing witness to a life that mattered as preciously as any of ours.

My colleagues and I call it the “ministry of presence.” Simply being with another person during their trials. Refraining from trite platitudes. Offering only love and grace. Over the years, it led me to sit beneath the bell jar with so many people, enduring their pressures with them, believing that the necessary remedies would emerge but that love and empathy come first.

Admittedly, I took this further than many. I remember being at the bedside of an elderly woman in her final days. She had no family left, and her failing heart would soon stop beating. I had been walking with her through all of this like a surrogate son.

She looked up at me, and in a weak voice said, “Pastor Krin, will you lie down next to me?”

Frankly, I didn’t care what the hospital staff felt. There was enough space next to her frail body, so I stretched out alongside her. She turned, laid her head against my shoulder, and softly fell asleep.

As I looked up at the ceiling of the hospital room, listening to her shallow breathing and the echo of voices in the hallway, something transcendent happened. The distortions of the bell jar completely cleared. There was only the present, the connection of two lives, and the omnipresent love that embraces all of us if we let it.

The Human Rights Champion You’ve (Probably) Never Heard of

In my decades as a cleric, I heard the stories of people from many walks of life. Sometimes their memories opened portals to dramatic moments in history, like this one from a homeless man who came to my office early one morning. He smelled of alcohol and had slept in his car all night. I still salute him!

Lately, I’ve been thinking about Ernestine (Ernie) Glossbrenner and the short time our lives intersected. Ernie was a member of First Presbyterian Church, Alice, Texas, where I served for a season. She was well-known in the community, not only for her years of teaching in local schools, but for her eight terms (1977-1993) as a Texas State Representative. In that role, she was an advocate for lower income families, abortion rights, the ERA, worker safety, and education reform.

Ernie was suffering severe health problems by the time we met, coping only through the assistance of her companion. Still, when I visited her, she enlivened our wonderful conversations. We shared our commonality as Democrats in a deeply red region of Texas, our universalist view of religion, and our love of literature.

In her final days, Ernie required regular dialysis at a facility in Corpus Christi. Her companion called me one day and said that Ernie would like me to bring communion to her during one of those treatments. I gladly packed up my kit and drove to that city on the Gulf.

The room at the facility was sterile and smelled of antiseptic. A number of patients were simultaneously receiving therapy, most of them staring blankly at the ceiling. Ernie looked up at me, smiled weakly, and nodded. She was near the end; we both knew it. Her voice was a hoarse whisper and her skin ashen-colored. As we partook of the bread and the cup, I reminded her of the untold number of witnesses who gathered with us in that sacramental moment.

When we had finished, I held her hand. “Ernie, thank you for your years of service to so many people. You have left a rich legacy. When you look back over your career, is there an accomplishment that gives you special satisfaction?”

I was surprised at how quickly and decisively she answered, her voice suddenly rising above a whisper and hinting at her lifetime of boldness.

“Legislation to banish the short-handled hoe,” she said.

I confess that later I had to educate myself with some online research. Here’s the summary.

Part of the United Farm Workers’ movement in the late 1960s and early ‘70s was a call to ban the short-handled hoe used by braceros working in the fields. Called el cortito or el brazo del diablo, it was only 18-24 inches long, requiring laborers to bend over or work on their knees. This often led to lifelong back deformities, beginning even with children. The tool was also a clear means of oppression, because if someone took a break and stood up, field foremen would immediately notice and order them back to work.

In their book The Fight in the Fields: Cesar Chavez and the Farmworkers Movement, Susan Ferriss and Ricardo Sandoval say, “(El Cortito) was the most potent symbol of all that was wrong with farm work in California.”

Thank God, this devil’s arm was finally banned in California in 1975, the first state to enact such legislation. When the movement spread to Texas, Ernie was cosponsor of a bill to do the same.

Ernie died with specific instructions for her memorial gathering, including a mariachi band that was to stand in the balcony of our church and play De Colores. People packed the sanctuary that day, and as I walked down the aisle, I carried a long-handled hoe, lifting it above my head with both arms to signify the beginning of the service. Numerous politicians and educators gave eulogies – testimony to Ernie’s wide-ranging influence.

It was truly a celebration of life. But it was more than that. It was a call to all of us to care about the lives of every person. Like this woman, this champion, who had empathy for every migrant worker bending low in a furrow.

As I heard these final lyrics of De Colores, I whispered my own “thank you” to Ernie for her example of service to others.

And this love
This great love of all the colors
Is very special to me